Tag Archives: software

Word Can Drive You Crazy

Posted on by
Comment

Maria Speaks Episode 5: Three Ways Word Can Drive You Crazy…And What You Can Do About Them

This episode is the first audio recording of one of the many articles I’ve written for the Informit.com Web site. Informit is the Web publishing arm of Pearson Education, which is the company that owns Peachpit Press. Most of the books I’ve written since 1995 have been for Peachpit. This makes me one of Informit’s favorite authors.

The folks at Informit publish my articles with screen shots as I write them. They’ve asked me not to republish them on my site. To make these articles easy to find, I’ve linked to them on the Articles page of my Web site. So if you want to read the transcript for this article and see the screenshots that go with it, just visit the Articles page on my Web site, www.aneclecticmind.com.

And if you’re a Word user looking for a book to help you get more out of the software, I hope you’ll pick up one of my Word Visual QuickStart Guides. I’ve been writing them for a while for Mac OS and Windows versions of Word. You can learn more about them and read other Word articles on my Web site, www.aneclecticmind.com.

Some People Just Can’t Read

Posted on by
1

I’m bothered by a reader seeking technical support.

I’d just checked into the Hotel McCall, in McCall, ID. Mike and I were making our way from the desk to the stairs when my cell phone vibrated.

“Hello?”

“Is this Maria Langer?”

“Yes.”

“The author of the bestselling guide to Quicken 2003?”

I started to get a bad feeling. “That’s what they tell me,” I replied.

The caller proceeded to introduce herself as an 88 year old woman living in New Mexico who had bought my Quicken 2003 book to learn Quicken. She was having a lot of trouble with the software and needed help.

“How much do you charge for consulting?” she finished.

“I’m sorry,” I told her as gently as I could. “I don’t do consulting anymore. And I don’t support my books by phone.” This is clearly stated numerous places on my Web site. “You called on my cell phone,” I added. “I’m on my way out. I’m sorry. I can’t help you. Go to Intuit’s Web site for help.”

And before she could protest, I flipped the phone closed.

Some readers just can’t read. They search my Web site for a phone number and call anyway. In this case, she went the next step: when she didn’t get me at my office (on a Saturday afternoon, no less), she decided to interrupt my weekend by bothering me on my cell phone.

I didn’t have a computer with me. And even if I did, it wouldn’t be a PC with Quicken 2003 installed. The current version of Quicken is 2006; can she honestly expect me to support (or remember) software that’s 3 years old?

In a way, I admire her guts. But don’t get any ideas. I don’t provide technical support by phone. Period. End of statement.

In fact, her call kind of pissed me off. Why? Because like a few other people over the past few years, she seemed to think that the statements I made on my Web site about technical support didn’t apply to her. Maybe it was because she was 88 years old. Maybe because she was a woman. Or because she lived in the southwest. Or because she was crafty enough to track down my phone number and dial it.

There’s an FAQ system on my Web site. One that I designed and implemented, with no small amount of effort, with FileMaker Pro. It’s basically a database of questions and answers. Readers seeking support are asked to read the questions and answers for the book they’re interested in. If their question is not answered, they may post another question. I usually get around to answering them within a week or so. Sadly, few readers bother to read the questions before posting their own.

And what is it with people? They think that just because they spend $25 on a book, they own a piece of the author. (And how much of that $25 do they think I get?) I don’t mind clarifying or correcting information in my book, but so many people want more. They want me to add content, just for them. Just write a few more pages covering the obscure topic they need to learn about.

So half the contents of the FAQ system fall into one of two categories: questions that are beyond the scope of my book and questions that I’ve already answered in the FAQ system. Once in a while, I’ll get a question from someone who claims to own the book but, if so, doesn’t know how to use a table of contents or index. When I get one of those, I just give him/her the page reference in the most recent edition of the book.

There’s another thing, too. I clearly state on my Web site that I only answer FAQ questions about books listed in the pop-up menu there. Quicken is not one of the listed books. Why? Because of all the abusive readers I’ve had to put up with over the past few years. People who use the FAQ system to post nasty comments about the book, followed by a question they demand an answer for. Comments and questions regarding missing content that is so obscure they’re likely to be the only people to miss it. Content that I wouldn’t cover even if the book were 2,000 pages long. One day, a reader pushed me too far. I deleted all the Quicken FAQs, removed the book from the menu of books, and stated that I was no longer supporting it. When I told my editor what I’d done, she wasn’t concerned. She thought that the FAQ system was already above and beyond the call of duty. So now readers can get support for the book from the publisher’s Web site.

Anyway, this reader’s call bugged me for a few hours. But then I tucked the experience away in the back of my mind and got on with my life.

AirPort Express with AirTunes

Posted on by
Comment

I buy yet another gadget for my Macs.

I’d just finished writing the Networking chapter of my Mac OS X 10.4 Tiger: Visual QuickStart Guide when my editor, Cliff, called me into an iChat chat. Cliff and I often use iChat during the day to ask each other quick questions.

“Why didn’t you include AirPort Express in the book?” he wanted to know.

“I don’t have one of those,” I told him. Or at least I typed at his icon, which was a orange globe that day. “I can’t be expected to buy every piece of Apple hardware,” I added.

This was true. Every year, I invested hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars buying the Apple hardware I needed to write my Mac OS X book. A new desktop Mac every two years. A new laptop every three years. AirPort base stations and cards. iPods. Digital cameras, scanners, color printers. The list went on and on. It was very costly and I had a huge collection of old hardware that I just didn’t have time to put on eBay. Apple might help legitimate authors out with software, but it seldom coughed up hardware for the cause.

“But we should mention it,” he insisted.

“Do people buy it?”

“I’m sure they do.”

I switched over to Safari and surfed on over to the Apple store where I read a description of AirPort Express. Among other things, it enabled you to send iTunes data from an AirPort-equiped Mac to compatible stereo speakers. I thought about Mike and his desire to buy a new receiver. I looked at the price. Oh hell. What was another $129?

So I bought one.

It’s actually a pretty cool little device. It plugs into a wall socket and has three ports: USB, Ethernet, and Audio Out. You plug the Ethernet into a Mac, cable modem or DSL connection, or hub. (Mine isn’t plugged into anything.) You plug the USB into a printer, so the printer is accessible to users on the network. (Mine isn’t plugged into anything.) And you plug the audio out into a pair of stereo speakers or, in our case, a stereo receiver with speakers attached.

Then you configure the whole thing with the AirPort Setup Assistant. You have two options: configure it just so it sends iTunes to the speakers or configure it so it extends an existing AirPort network. I chose the second option. I mean, why not? And the iTunes to stereo thing still works.

It’s kind of cool to control the stereo upstairs with my PowerBook in the kitchen.

I’m impressed. I added a tiny bit of info to the book about it. But I’m also going to write an article about it for InformIt.com. That’s how I pay for this stuff, after all.

More About Writing Software

Posted on by
Comment

I can’t believe people can use this kind of stuff.

While on the topic of software for writers (see “Software Isn’t Always the Answer“), a long time ago, I was given a copy of Dramatica Pro, “The Ultimate Writing Partner.” I think I was supposed to try it out and say nice things about it in a column somewhere. But since I couldn’t come up with anything nice to say about it, I didn’t say anything. That was nearly 10 years ago. I don’t mind breaking my silence now.

Dramatica Pro is software designed to help you write. Oddly enough, it comes with three manuals, one of which is a whopping 400 pages long, to explain the software and the writing theory on which it is based. (To be fair, one of them is a book of perforated worksheets, which seems a bit silly to me, since you’re supposed to be doing all your character development, plotting, etc. with the software.) It also comes with a fold-out Table of Story Elements, which presents the database fields and options you fill in while working in the software. For example, in the Universe class, Past and Progress are two types; in the Progress type, Fact, Security, Threat, and Fantasy are variations; in the Security variation, Effect, Result, Process, and Cause are elements. Confused yet? I was (and still am). No wonder there’s a 400-page book to explain this stuff.

I never got any farther than installing the software. I know because I have no recollection of using it beyond a quick peek at its interface. And it isn’t as if I didn’t try. I just pulled the software out of my closet to refresh my memory (before filing it permanently in the circular file) and I found a plane ticket receipt in it. I obviously took this heavy box all the way to Kansas City with me on a business trip back in 1997. Kansas City isn’t exactly a hot spot. I’m sure I had plenty of time to play around with the software after work in my hotel room. Yet I know for a fact that I didn’t use it.

Why do you think that is? Probably because I don’t believe that I need software to help me think. And I don’t think writing should be so complex that you need a piece of software supported by 400+ pages of theory to get the job done. 400+ pages with subheadings like “The Obstacle Character Throughline” — oddly enough, my spelling checker doesn’t recognize the word throughline any better than I do — and “Psychology as Obstacle Character Domain.” Hey people using this software are writing a novel or short story, not a doctoral thesis. Whatever happened to developing characters, formulating plot, and writing? Do you know how much time it must take to use software like this to plan out a novel? Especially after deciphering the theory manual and learning how to use the software? And what struggling writer has $250+ to plunk down on a piece of software that can’t even be used as a word processor?

Does it surprise you that the folks at Writer’s Digest rated this software as “excellent”? (I have my own theories about Writer’s Digest, but it wouldn’t do anyone any good to present them here.)

Guess what? I just did a Google search and found that they’re still making Dramatica Pro. And guess what’s on the home page of the Dramatica Web site? “February Tip: Separating the Story Throughlines.” (I’m starting to get curious about just what a throughline is.)

What’s my point? Damned if I know.

Oh yes. It’s this: all of the classics of literature and fiction were written without the assistance of a piece of writing software based on a complex writing theory. If those authors didn’t need software help, does anyone?

Heck, we have word processors. They had typewriters. Or pens and pencils. Or — dare I say it? — fountain pens. Isn’t that enough of a technological edge for you?

It certainly is for me.

Software Isn’t Always the Answer

Posted on by
Comment

I explain to a fellow computer geek that software isn’t a substitute for good writing.

The other day, I got an e-mail message from a computer consultant who writes for one of the magazines I write for. (Or used to write for; I haven’t written anything for them for so long I’m surprised they remember me at all.) He’d written a book about databases and he wanted to know what book proposal software he should buy to write a perfect book proposal.

Software to write a book proposal? Is this a trick question? Isn’t the answer Microsoft Word or some other word processing software? Is there such a thing as book proposal software?

I explained patiently that a writer didn’t need special software to write a book proposal. All he needed was (1) to know the components of a book proposal and (2) to be able to put those components into an acceptable format. If he could write a book, he could write a book proposal. With the same software.

I told him that there were literally dozens of books and articles about how to write a book proposal — including the eBook I’d written for David Lawrence’s 10 Quick Steps series last year. Don’t waste money on special software. Don’t waste time looking for special software that probably didn’t even exist. Just pick up a book proposal guide, read it, and follow its advice.

He e-mailed me back a day or two later to thank me and tell me he’d bought my book. How nice!

I wonder what he’ll say to himself when he gets to the part that urges nonfiction authors to propose and sell a book before writing it.