Antelope Canyon

An incredible slot canyon near Page, AZ.

Antelope Canyon from the airAntelope Canyon is a narrow slot canyon, about 1/4 miles long, that carves its way through a huge sandstone rock formation that would otherwise block Antelope Wash. From the air, it isn’t very impressive at all — just a wide, sandy wash with a big rock in it — a rock that happens to have a slit carved down its middle. (This shot was taken in September, from the south looking north.) But from the ground, it’s something amazing. A cool, isolated retreat from the desert heat.

At least it would be if it weren’t such a tourist attraction.

In all fairness, you can still get a feeling of isolation at Antelope Canyon. Just find a quiet spot somewhere in the middle of the slot and wait there patiently until the tour groups walk through and come back. You’ll hear the echo of voices, sometimes hushed, and see the laser pointers of the Navajo guides pointing out what the gringos want to see: the Liberty Bell, the bear, Abe Lincoln’s profile. But even that fades away as the guide leaves her charges to explore on their own. Most folks don’t last long. It’s a beautiful place, but where are the gift shops? Few stop to appreciate what they’re seeing — the force of water cutting through stone over thousands of years. When they wander back out to the tour truck, they leave the canyon in silence for you and the dedicated photographers who have also waited. Enjoy this fleeting moment; another tour truck is on its way.

Antelope CanyonI’ve been to Antelope Canyon twice. I think I took this photo on the first trip. I didn’t have a tripod — which is highly recommended for photography — on either trip, but I still managed to get one or two clear shots.

I also got to experience the quiet calm of the canyon for a few moments as I leaned up against one of its smooth, cool walls in the shadows and watched the rays of light play on the dust particles hanging in the air. I jotted down these notes in a small notebook I had with me, trying to capture the feeling of the moment:

Sandstone swirls [smooth]
Carved cracks open to the sky
80,000 years
Cedar trees from 40 miles away
An owl’s nest
Echoes in German
A cool seat
Fine pink sand
The floor rises and falls
Too dark for photos
Shafts of reflected light
A bird calls far above [insistent]
Tumbleweed hangs overhead
The light turns the paper blue
Here comes a breeze
A shower of sand
Stripes
Let your eyes adjust and all is revealed.

The best time to visit Antelope Canyon is midday, midweek, off-season. Although midday is good for photography and popular with tourists, there are always fewer tourists on weekdays during the off-season months. I’m willing to bet that March and September are good. I’ll try it one of these days and let you know.

New Excel Book in Progress

After two months off from writing, I begin work on an Excel book revision.

Creating Spreadsheets and Charts in Excel: Visual QuickProject GuideI dove into a revision of my Creating Spreadsheets and Charts in Excel: Visual QuickProject Guide book today. I actually got the first chapter — all 16 pages of it — done.

If you’re not familiar with the VQJ (as Peachpit calls it) series, it’s pretty simple. Written for raw beginners, the books use a lot of full color illustrations, large text, numbered steps, and callout lines. Each book in the series is only 144 or 168 pages long — this one weighs in at 144 pages. It’s not the least bit intimidating for any reader.

The first edition of the book covered Excel 2003 for Windows and Excel 2004 for Mac OS. The two versions of Excel are virtually identical, so it made sense to do one book to cover them both. I think I did a good job giving each platform equal space and showing screenshots from both platforms when they were significantly different.

The idea behind the series is to present a project — in this case, creating a budget spreadsheet, duplicating it for multiple months of information, consolidating the months, formatting the spreadsheets so they look good, creating a chart, and printing. All the basics are covered in one project, presented over multiple chapters. The first chapter covers preliminary stuff like interface elements and terminology. The next chapter is where we start creating the spreadsheet.

Creating Resumes, Letters, Business Cards, and Flyers in Word: Visual QuickProject GuideI have two books in this series. This one is doing very well and has been translated into at least two languages. The other book — take a deep breath if you plan to read the title out loud — Creating Resumes, Letters, Business Cards, and Flyers in Word: Visual QuickProject Guide (I had to look it up; I can never remember the title of that book), isn’t doing quite as well. I like to think it’s because people don’t really want to create all those things. But it’s probably because the Word book market is full of titles and this 168-page tome just doesn’t stand out enough on bookstore shelves.

Creating Spreadsheets and Charts in Microsoft Excel 2007: Visual QuickProject GuideThis Excel book revision is not cross platform. Tentatively titled Creating Spreadsheets and Charts in Microsoft Excel 2007: Visual QuickProject Guide, it covers Excel 2007 for Windows only. (It always amazes me when Amazon.com knows what one of my books will look like before I do.) To write it, I not only had to get my hands on the Office beta, but I also had to get the Windows Vista beta, which my editor wanted running on the computer for all the screenshots. Without Vista, he claimed, the book would look outdated right away. He’s right. And although I wasn’t too thrilled about running beta application software on beta System software, it seems to be working pretty well. Of course, I had to buy a new computer to run all this stuff. My ancient Dell desktop machine would have dropped dead if I tried installing Vista on it, especially with the new graphics-intensive interface. The new Dell Latitude 820 laptop I bought to replace it is handling everything with ease. It should for what it cost me. But with luck, I won’t have to replace it for 4 to 5 years.

Office 2007 is no secret. You can see screenshots and all kinds of training material on the Microsoft Office 2007 Preview site. You might even still be able to download a beta. It’ll run on Windows XP and Vista, so you don’t have to do a double beta like I did to run it.

Over the years, many have complained that Office doesn’t change much with each new version. You won’t hear those complaints this time around. Microsoft has completely reworked the interface. The menus and toolbars are gone, replaced with something called the Ribbon. Click a Ribbon tab to view groups of commands. Click a command to invoke it. Or click a tiny button in the corner of a group to display a good old dialog box.

The new design does appear to be easier for newbies to grasp. But I think it’ll frustrate the hell out of seasoned Office users — at least until they get used to the interface. There’s logic behind it, so if you think about what you want to do, you can figure out where to find the buttons or menus you need to do it. And all the old keyboard shortcuts still work, so if you’ve been using Office applications for years, you won’t be at a total loss in the new version.

Of course, all this has me wondering whether they’ll use the same interface in the Mac version of Office when it gets updated. That would be almost sacrilegious. After all, didn’t Apple invent the interface so widely used by Mac OS and Windows programs? I can’t imagine a Mac program without a menu bar that starts with File and Edit. I guess time will tell.

What’s good about all this for me is that people will need a book to learn the new versions of Office applications. They can’t just use an old Office book to work with the new version. With luck, that’ll help book sales a little. After all, I have to pay for that fancy new computer, don’t I?

Stay tuned for more information about this book as it is completed. It will definitely make it to stores at the same time as Office 2007 — heck, at the rate I’m going, I should be done with it by the end of the month.

Hell Season is Over

Who says Arizona doesn’t have seasons? We have five.

While I was away in Kingman last weekend, the heat broke and monsoon season — also known as hell season — ended. The humidity dried up to nothing, glasses of iced beverages stopped “sweating,” and the nights became cool enough to open the windows and leave the air conditioning turned off. The mornings are pleasantly cool right up until late morning — and sometimes throughout the day, if you stay in the shade.

In fact, I didn’t even run the air conditioner in my office yesterday. I kept the windows open on either side of the building and placed the floor fan in a position to help that cross-ventilation. I left the windows open overnight, so this morning, I should have cool, fresh air to breathe while I work.

I’m a fresh air kind of person. If given a choice between fresh air and air conditioning, I’ll take the fresh stuff most times. The only time I won’t take the fresh air is when it’s 100°F or higher with that touch of humidity that makes you sweat in the desert.

One clue that monsoon season is over is the complete lack of clouds. Take, for example, yesterday’s time-lapse movie of the view out my office window. The only way you can tell that it’s a movie is the movement of the shadows and ocotillo branches. (Click the Play button to see the movie. You must have QuickTime installed to view it.)

The high today is forecast for 85 in Wickenburg (according to the National Weather Service), with a low of 60. During monsoon season, the low seldom gets lower than 80.

So hell season is over and the autumn season is beginning.

To me, autumn in Wickenburg lasts from the last day of monsoon season (usually in mid-September) until Thanksgiving. October is always the best autumn month. Warm but not hot in the daytime, with low humidity and gentle breezes. Sometimes a bit of rain. Perfect for gardening, hiking, and other outdoor activities. At night, it cools down, but doesn’t get cold. You can throw on a sweater or jacket and do outdoor things without feeling a chill.

We always encourage our east coast family and friends to visit in October. Of course, October is also the best month in New York, where autumn colors peak and the temperature is perfect day and night. In Wickenburg, the only fall colors we have come from the cottonwood trees, and they don’t usually get to the peak of their autumn splendor (yellow) until November.

Winter lasts from Thanksgiving until early March. The worst of it is usually between Thanksgiving and Christmas. The days are still warm — this is Arizona, after all — but the nights are downright cold. In Wickenburg, nighttime temperatures in the 20s are not unusual. During the day, it might be 75°, but as soon as the sun slips beyond the horizon, it’s like someone turned off a heater. All the warm air escapes through the atmosphere. You can actually watch the mercury drop on a thermometer — perhaps 20° in an hour. The coldest time, of course, is right before dawn. Then the sun comes up and the desert warms for the day. This is also the second most rainy season, good for at least an inch or two during the three or so months.

Spring comes sometime in March. The days aren’t too much warmer, but the nights seem to be. Desert plants start to bloom or send out new branches or other growth. It gets very dry — April is normally the driest month here. By April, the days and nights are perfect — although some people who don’t know the rhythm of the desert seasons might think temperatures in the 90s are hot. Nah. Stay in the shade, enjoy the dry air. If you do need to go out in the sun, wear a hat and sunscreen.

April is also the best month for camping in Arizona. I’m hoping to verify that next spring.

Summer starts in the beginning of June. That’s when daytime temperatures exceed 100° pretty much every day. But it’s still comfortable in the shade, primarily because the air is so dry. Yes, it is a dry heat. And if you don’t understand what that means, stand in the shade on a June afternoon, at around 2 or 3 PM (the hottest time of the day), with an iced beverage. You won’t feel hot and there won’t be a drop of condensation on the glass. And at night, it’s still cool enough to keep those windows open.

Sometime in July, hell season begins. I distinctly remember its start the second or third summer we were in Arizona. It was July 4 and we were in town, waiting for the fireworks show to begin. I realized that I was sweating. The humidity had begun, bringing the most brutal of our five seasons with it.

Don’t get me wrong — monsoon season isn’t all bad. The storms that come, usually in the afternoon, are just incredible to watch. Clouds build, lightning flashes, thunder shakes your very soul. Rain comes down in buckets — if not where you’re standing, then certainly within view somewhere nearby. Dry, sandy washes turn into streams and rivers, sweeping away anything in their path. The desert gets the moisture it needs to survive and desert plants and animals soak it up until the next rain. A day or two after the first storm, the desert turns green with freshly sprouted grass. The dust that covered plants and rocks has been washed off and everything is clear and crisp and beautiful.

But it is hotter than hell (or at least pretty close to it, I bet). You’ve probably heard the joke about why Arizonans don’t go to hell when they die. It’s because they’ve already lived there.

Monsoon season goes on for at least half of July, all of August (the worst of it), and the beginning of September. And that brings us to autumn, which we’ve just stepped into here in Wickenburg. And I plan to enjoy every moment of it.

Helicopter Calendar

I order my office calendar far in advance.

Last year, I waited too long to order the helicopter calendar that always hangs in my office. It was sold out and the publisher ran out of stock. I got stuck with a frog calendar that I bought in mid-January. (At least it didn’t cost very much.)

This year, I ordered early — last week in fact — to round out an order at Amazon.com for a pair of DustBuster batteries. The batteries and calendar arrived today.

I’m disappointed. Brown Trout, the calendar publisher, usually has much better photos than these. Most of them were taken from the ground of a helicopter landing, taking off, or just sitting there. Three of them are of Grand Canyon tour operator helicopters (a Papillon Bell 206L, a Papillon Bell 407, and a Grand Canyon Helicopters Eurocopter EC130) and I’m willing to bet all three photos were taken on the same day at the companies’ respective landing zones. Papillon Copter 9 (which I flew several times; it’s a utility ship and rather underpowered when compared to the others) is obviously doing its takeoff run, the 407 is sitting on the pad, and the Ecostar is probably landing. Four photos were taken from the ground or some high place looking up at the helicopter, so you can see its underside. And, if I’m not mistaken, all of the photos were taken in Arizona.

You can see twelve better photos of helicopters in a single issue of Vertical magazine.

But since Brown Trout seems to be the only helicopter calendar publisher, I’m pretty much stuck with this calendar.

And it is much better than the frogs.

Helicopter Rides at the Mohave County Fair

Our second try at this venue is a success.

This past weekend, we headed up to the Mohave County Fair in Kingman, AZ, to sell helicopter rides. It was the second time we’d participated at the fair, and although we didn’t take as many passengers as last year, we did do better financially.

This was a “trial” event in several respects.

First, I’d bought a 21-foot travel trailer specifically for events like this one. This was a three-day event (at least for us) and there were four of us. Two hotel rooms for two nights plus three meals a day would have cost a fortune, eating into our profits. And Mike had to drive up to Kingman anyway — we had a lot of gear to bring with us and I wouldn’t be able to take four people plus luggage plus gear in the helicopter. So he pulled the trailer up and we parked it, like last year, at the edge of our landing zone. It comfortably fit all four of us for the weekend and allowed me to stock up on breakfast and lunch foods so we wouldn’t have to go out to eat every meal.

Some minor problems we noticed with the camper setup: if one or more of the crew doesn’t understand the importance of water conservation, a single shower can wipe out the contents of the freshwater tank — and fill the graywater tank. This happened on two occasions; one of the crewmembers liked long showers. In the future, we need to brief the crew about this. While we had access to fresh water at this venue, it’s unlikely that we’ll have access to water at every venue. That means 40 gallons has to last the whole stay. Also, if the location is cold at night, we’ll need more blankets or have to run the heater overnight. The tent-like bed covers don’t do a good job of keeping out the cold. (In fact, my tent does a better job.) So climbing into bed and closing the privacy curtain on a cold night is a very bad idea. And the tent areas certainly didn’t keep the outdoor sounds outdoors. The worst was from a carnival ride nearby called Crazy Loops (or something like that). It was a vertical circle with a roller-coaster-like track running on the inside. They’d load up the people and then rock the cars back and forth on the circle until they finally reached the top. Then the operator would stop the cars, inverted, giving all the passengers a good chance to scream their brains out. He’d release the cars and they’d do a loop or two, complete with more screams, before he let them come to a stop at the bottom. Inside, at 10 PM when we were trying to sleep, we’d hear the screams and the loud rushing sound of the cars as they moved on the tracks. We also heard the rock music from another nearby ride, which seemed to get louder at night. We’ll be stocking earplugs for the next gig.

Otherwise, the camper was perfect. Small, easy to tow and park, lightweight so it doesn’t suck fuel out of the truck. Mike only burned 1/2 tank of fuel on the 130 mile drive — and I guarantee that he wasn’t driving at fuel conservation speeds. The fridge held all the food we needed and more. There was plenty of storage space for each person’s clothing and toiletries. The dining area and sofa made two separate hanging out places. Comfy for four people, a dog, and a bird.

Another trial was our use of complete strangers for ground crew. I’d found a helicopter student pilot at a Phoenix-area flight school and asked him to bring his wife. I needed two people: one to help Mike load and the other to take the money. But I was hoping to do this without having to convert the sofa into a bed at night. The solution: invite another couple.

They did their jobs okay — we kept track of all the money and maintained a safe landing zone. But they were a bit too meek to really sell the rides. You see, when a person is sitting on the fence (so to speak) about taking a ride, the person at the counter has to go into hard sell mode and make them want it. These folks couldn’t do it. Mike and I, when we were near the sell table, had no trouble convincing visitors to the table to fly. But more than once, while sitting in the helicopter waiting, I saw people approach the table, talk to my ground crew, and then walk off. While I’m not saying they should be able to sell to everyone who comes by, I think that a more aggressive or less laid back sales person would have gotten us more business. It might have something to do with age — they were in their early twenties. I think some young people just lack the confidence or courage to step up and play the ball hard.

Ah, if only I could import a few New Yorkers for the job.

But they were certainly pleasant and easy to live with for a few days. And that’s important, too. Who wants to be stuck at a fairgrounds with people they can’t stand?

This also turned out to be a trial for a new pricing structure. Last year, we did the rides at $25 per person and barely broke even. This year, I was offering the same ride (well, maybe a tiny bit shorter) for $35 per person, with a reduction to $30 per person if there were three people on board. I had banners hung on the fence with this pricing information. Friday was a bust because high winds kept me from flying. (I don’t like to do rides with winds 25 knots gusting to 35 knots. Oddly enough, my passengers don’t like it either.) But on Saturday, things were slow to pick up. I’d hired two people to help out and all I could imagine was the tiny revenue stream going into their pockets while I took a loss. So I introduced another pricing scheme, a “Show Special.” We’d do rides just around the fairgrounds for $15 per person. We took down the other pricing banners and my ground crew started selling rides.

Mind you, I felt terribly guilty about selling these rides. They were about 3-1/2 minutes long — that’s all! — but people we lining up to get on board. And no one was disappointed. We still sold a bunch of “extended rides” at the old pricing. So I kept flying and the money kept coming in. We did the same on Sunday, too. I don’t know how many people I flew — I didn’t keep count and my ground crew weren’t using the tickets I’d bought for the event consistently. But I figure I must have flown at least 120 people.

Doing helicopter rides at a fair or any other event is hard work. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. And this venue was very difficult. Although the landing zone was nice and big, it was bordered on one side (closeby) with a 6-foot chainlink fence, on another side with parked cars, and another side with our camper and the carnival beyond it. Overflying the carnival or the cars was not an option. That left the fence or the empty part of the parking lot, which had wires at the far end and I-40 beyond it. The wind was blowing from that direction, making it great for taking off but really crappy (and very tricky) for landing. And since the area wasn’t paved, I created huge dust clouds every time I landed. The dust would blow right into the carnival area, making a few of the ride operators pretty pissed off. (Last year, the wind was blowing the opposite direction, keeping dust out of the carnival but giving me a tailwind for takeoffs. I prefer that. If you can take off with a tailwind, you know you can land with a headwind.)

Of course, we did have water and a sprinkler to try to keep the dust down. It worked reasonably well, especially when I was doing longer rides. Mike had the sprinkler set up in the landing zone and would turn it on while I was flying. As I came in for landing, he’d turn it off. When I was out for 8 minutes at a stretch, the ground got good and soaked. But when I was out for 3-1/2 minutes followed by 5 minutes unloading/loading, my idle downwash did more drying than the wind did. Mike managed to flag down the fair’s water truck once and that made a world of difference — for about 2 hours.

Here’s now the whole thing worked.

I’d wait at idle RPM (68% or so) in the landing zone. No dust at idle speeds. Jen and Mike and Aaron would sell tickets. Mike would give the safety briefing, using the briefing card. Then he and Aaron would walk the passengers out to the helicopter. Mike would take two to the other side while Aaron took one to my side. They’d load the people up, make sure their seat belts were fastened, give them their headsets, and secure their doors. Then they’d walk clear of the helicopter and give me a thumbs up to indicate that I was good to go.

I’d greet the passengers, soothe anyone who was nervous, throttle up to full RPM, and say “Here we go.” Then I’d check the area for stray people, lift up, turn 90 to 180 °, and take off over the fence. So yes — every takeoff was a maximum performance takeoff. And that was the first big challenge, given that today’s population is very fat so I was heavy (but not over max gross weight) for every flight. Kingman is at about 3500 feet and it was in the 80s each day. The wind helped on takeoff but could not be relied upon.

I’d climb out over an unused horse racing track and over I-40, turning left as I flew. When I got up to altitude (at least 400 feet), I’d either continue the left turn back toward the fairgrounds for the short tour or follow I-40 through the pass to downtown Kingman. I’d point out things of interest along the way, customizing my “tour” for my audience. For example, if I had a little kid on board, I point out trucks and trains (“Don’t they look small?”) and if I had adults who lived in Kingman on board, I’d point out old Route 66 and certain intersections to help them get their bearings.

I’d circle around on both flights to come up along the east side of the fairgrounds, where I’d start my descent. Then, depending on how the wind was blowing, I’d either come in over the track or circle out over I-40 again and come in from there. I always had a cross wind or, in some instances, a tail wind, so I had to be careful about descent rates. And, when the wind gusted, I had to really work the pedals to keep the helicopter steady. Didn’t want to look sloppy and scare off spectators that were potential customers. I’d approach over all that dirt and, if I didn’t get within 10 feet of the wet area, I’d send up a huge cloud that probably took a ton of paint off my rotor blades.

I’d set down and ask my passengers how they liked it. Then I’d hand out helicopter toys to kids under 12. Mike and Aaron would offload the passengers, send them back to the entrance of the landing zone, and wave the next group over.

Repeat.

We worked until it got dark on Saturday and called it quits at 3 PM on Sunday.

We packed up and flew home soon afterward. I did one last minute ride for two passengers while Mike pulled out of the fairgrounds with the camper and our two helpers waited for their ride home. Then a quick trip to the airport for fuel and off we went. We got back to Wickenburg around 5:30 PM.

In all, it was a good weekend — although I think it could have been better. I was able to pay my helpers and make some money for Flying M Air. We’ll probably do the fair again next year. But after doing some quick calculations on costs, I realized that it was unlikely that we could make money at the upcoming Graham County Fair in Safford — especially since it was so far away. I canceled our appearance yesterday.

Today, I spent a half hour vacuuming fine gravel from the floor of my helicopter and washing the dust and fingerprints off the windows. I didn’t have time to wash the whole helicopter — I’ll do that tomorrow before it gets hot.

Next big event: the Goodyear Balloon Classic and Air Show (formerly the Thunderbird Balloon Classic). That should be a good gig. Best of all, I’ll be landing on pavement and the folks who hired me will provide the ground crew.